What Should We Do If My Child Feels Discouraged or Wants to Quit Wrestling?

Wrestling is one of the toughest sports a young athlete can try. It’s physically demanding, mentally exhausting, and emotionally challenging. For many kids, it pushes them in ways they’ve never experienced before. So it’s no surprise that at some point—whether it’s after a tough loss, a bad practice, or simply feeling overwhelmed—your child may feel discouraged or want to quit.

As a parent, this moment can be difficult to navigate. You want to support your child’s feelings, but you also want to teach them about perseverance and commitment. So how do you know when to push through and when to step back?

In this blog, we’ll explore why kids sometimes feel like quitting, what signs to look for, and how to help your child regain motivation, confidence, and love for the sport.

Understand Why They Feel Discouraged

The first step is listening. Instead of jumping in with advice or trying to “fix it” right away, take time to really hear what your child is saying. There are many reasons a young wrestler might want to quit, and it’s important to understand which one they’re dealing with.

Common reasons include:

Frustration from losing matches
Feeling like they’re not improving
Struggles with confidence or comparing themselves to others
Physical fatigue or soreness
Not enjoying the practice environment
Feeling overwhelmed by the pressure to perform

Once you identify the reason, you can respond with more empathy and guidance.

Normalize the Feeling

It’s important to remind your child that feeling discouraged is completely normal, especially in a sport as tough as wrestling. Even elite-level athletes have moments when they doubt themselves or feel like giving up.

Share stories (your own or others’) of setbacks, comebacks, and hard-earned growth. Let them know that the greatest lessons in wrestling often come after the hardest days, and that it’s okay to feel tired, defeated, or unsure—they’re not alone.

Focus on Progress, Not Just Winning

Many young wrestlers tie their confidence to their win-loss record. If they’re not winning matches, they may start to feel like they’re failing—even when they’re actually improving.

Help your child shift the focus from outcome to effort. Ask questions like:

“What’s something you did better today than last week?”
“What technique have you improved on recently?”
“Did you give your best effort, even when it was tough?”

Celebrate the small wins. Over time, these moments build the foundation for real success—and they help your child see that progress is more important than perfection.

Encourage a Break, Not a Quit

If your child seems burned out, it’s okay to suggest a short break. Sometimes, stepping away for a week or two can bring back perspective and motivation.

Let them rest, recharge, and return to the mat with fresh energy. Often, taking a step back allows kids to realize what they actually love about the sport—and they come back stronger because of it.

Avoid making quitting a quick decision. Instead, encourage them to finish the season, complete a few more practices, or try one more tournament. Finishing what they started builds character, even if they decide not to return next season.

Involve the Coach

If your child continues to feel discouraged, it might help to speak with their coach. A good coach will be understanding, supportive, and may even adjust how they interact with your child to rebuild confidence.

Coaches can:

Offer extra encouragement
Pair your child with supportive partners
Adjust the level of challenge
Reinforce skill development instead of competition pressure

Open communication between parent, coach, and athlete can go a long way toward solving the problem together.

Make Sure They’re Having Fun

At the end of the day, wrestling should be a positive and rewarding experience—even if it’s tough. Fun doesn’t mean easy, but it should mean fulfilling. If your child is constantly stressed, unhappy, or dreading practice, it may be time to adjust how they’re training.

Try adding lighter elements to the routine, such as:

Skill-based games during practice
Friendly matches or team-building activities
Attending tournaments just to watch and learn

Reconnecting with the joy of learning and being part of a team can help rekindle your child’s love for the sport.

Know When It’s Truly Time to Move On

Sometimes, a child gives their full effort, and even with support, they simply don’t enjoy the sport. And that’s okay. Wrestling isn’t for everyone. What matters most is that your child gave it an honest shot and learned something about themselves along the way.

If they’ve completed the season or followed through on a commitment, it’s completely reasonable to explore other activities that might be a better fit for their personality and interests.

Quitting doesn’t mean failure—it means growth, reflection, and discovering what drives your child to be their best.

Turning Discouragement Into Growth

When your child feels discouraged or wants to quit wrestling, your response matters. It’s an opportunity to teach them about resilience, self-awareness, and making thoughtful decisions. By listening, supporting, and encouraging them to reflect, you help them build life skills that go beyond the sport.

Wrestling will test your child, but those tests can lead to strength, confidence, and character—if they learn to face them with support and perspective. And whether they stick with it or move on, they’ll be better prepared for whatever challenge comes next.